Filed under: Running
When I was running in the race last weekend, I thoroughly enjoyed the music along the road, from start to finish. They picked the BEST running music.
Here is my list of running songs:
1. Lifehouse’s “Hanging by a Moment” (I love this song!)
2. Rolling Stone’s “Start me Up”
3. Katie Perry’s “Hot N Cold”
4. Britney’s “Womanizer”
5. Lifehouse’s “Spin”
6. Alanis Morriset’s “Ironic”
7. Coldplay’s “Viva la Vida”
8. Rihanna’s “SOS”
9. All American Rejects’ “Swing Swing”
10. Counting Crow’s “Accidentally in Love”
11. Eminen’s “Lose Yourself”
12. Pink’s “Who Knew”
13. All American Rejects’ “Dirty Little Secret”
14. Killers’ “Mr Brightside”
15. Avril Lavigne’s “Girlfriend”
16. Matchbox 20’s “How Far We’ve Come”
17. KT Tunstall’s “Suddenly I see”
18. 3 Doors Down “Kryptonite”
19. A ha’s “Take on me”
20. Ricky Martin’s “Living La Vida Loca”
21. U2’s “Beautiful Day”
Woo hoo!
Filed under: Teaching
When I was a first year PhD student, I got a lot of points taken off in an exam when I plotted a convex curve where the endpoints didn’t touch the axis. The TA who docked me was called Ehsan. He is known to be fuddy duddy when grading exams and homeworks.
I never thought I was one of those people.
Today is memorial public holiday, but I still had to host a TA session since a homework is due tomorrow and it seems that several students have questions about it. So I hosted it in the basement of our library in one of those cubicle…and several students and I huddled around a blackboard.
So I was scribbling on the blackboard a proof to something one of the questions (specifically, finding and showing the conditions on income elasticities of transportation and housing demanded for which a stable locational equilibrium exist when you have heterogeneous income groups of people, and rent depends on distance). I was trying to be organized on the board.
When I turned around, 8 pairs of large, shocked eyes were staring at me.
“Are we supposed to know this?”
“What about those people who didn’t come to the TA session?”
I said, “Too bad for them.”
On student said, “I mean, if I hadn’t come to this TA session, I wouldn’t have dreamt that I need to write this.”
I said, “This is not hard, right?”
Another student said, “Honestly, this is hard.”
The first student continued, “Seriously, if we hadn’t come, we wouldn’t have known to write this.”
I said, “You are such a nice person…don’t you want variance in the problem set grades?”
He said, “Sure…but what about the other guys?”
I said, “Too bad for them, they should have come.”
*********
Their look of shock reminds me of my look of shocks during TA sessions in my first year when I saw the solutions written out by one of my TAs. I didn’t know I could ever have produced this effect.
Perhaps I was being too fuddy-duddy like Ehsan.
Or perhaps I was feeling vengeful because my grandmother died today.
Filed under: Running
So yes, I did it, and not only did I do it, I also did it ALMOST beautifully. My personal goals going into this race were:
1. finish the race
2. don’t stop running
3. finish with a pace faster than 12:00min/mile
I mostly achieved my personal goals. My first 6 miles were beautiful — I kept on thinking how well I was doing those 6; I was comfortably breathing, I was smiling all the time, I cheered whenever I saw camera men, I high-fived whenever hands were extended. Most of all, I was running — FAST. This is what people call “SHE IS ON A ROLL”. I didn’t even feel the need to stop at the aid stations to drink water — and I passed by 3 aid stations without taking a sip. My pace, which genuinely surprised me — was always around 9ish min/mile whenever I checked my fancy Garmin watch. This was really fast by my standard.
THEN, I had to pee. I took a one minute bathroom break. And then I started feeling thirsty. Then pain started registering on my right abdomen. Then my breathing became uneven. At mile 7 or 8, I was dying. But at the same time, I thought to myself, what a beautiful route this is. I know this running route, because I did my 8 miles last weekend on the very same road.
By the way, the music along the racing route was great running music.
The running got a little better as I got to just about 8 miles, when these passerbys started yelling “2 more to go!”. So I was picking up my pace again at this point, and several times I checked the watch I have reverted back to 9ish or early 10ish.
BUT, what made this an ALMOST beautiful race was what happened next. As I got to 9.5 mile, I saw this green banner sustained by two columns, so I thought I was reaching the finish line — so I went on a SPRINT. A sprint as in 7-8 min/mile sprint, racing past people, running crazily.
Spectators were gathering at this junction because it is close to the finish line — note it is CLOSE to the finish line, but not the actual finish line. So I discovered after the SPRINT that what I thought was the finish line was NOT the finish line, and in fact, the finish line is 0.5 mile away. At that point, I was like a deflated balloon. Basically, I felt that my lungs were gonna blow up, or more graphically, as if they were gonna be spill out from my mouth….and I simply could not run at all. So I just stopped. (Meanwhile, all the runners which I just passed by were sprinting to the end at this point…they just ran past me). At this time, I heard a lot of “AWWWWW” among the spectators, because at the end point it is usual for people to be sprinting not stopping!
After what I think should be about 20 seconds, I struggled back to the pace, running very, very slowly to the finish line, where my eyebrows were locked and intense (because of my spilling lungs), and a contrast to what I imagined would be this victorious hand-waving eye at the camera sort of cheering and sprinting at the end point.
So you see, it could be a 100 percent beautiful race, but that fake finish line tricked me.
However, I have to say, I am very satisfied with my race. The runners were just great. The weather was great. It was just an amazing race, and I am hooked now. Most importantly, I exceeded myself.
Here is my official race record (it’s on the website now)…total finishing time is 1:44:10…though personally I would delete one minute for my bathroom break in the middle. That makes my average pace at about 10:30 min / mile.
My the personal goal is to average 9:30 min / mile in the next long distance race.
Here is my record according to the race sponsor webiste:
Place Div /Tot Sex Name No. Ag Div St Nettime Pace Split Guntime
===== ========= ==== ==== ===== == ===== == ==== === ===== =======
5501 880/1222 2651 ANNA WONG 8768 26 F2529 IL 1:44:10 10:25 50:12 1:55:46
Rankings: 878 out of 999 in my age group 25-29. 5501 out of 7365.
Filed under: Musings
The results of these races amaze me. First, Kris Allen won American Idol, despite ALL THE HYPES about Adam Lambert — before this finale, there couldn’t have been more pimping of anyone candidate as Lambert — then the midget Shawn Johnson won DWTS over two hyped contestants….then Mine that Bird won by 50-1 odds against the other horses.
Just amazing!
Those three are what you call “dark horses”.
Next thing you know, I win the 10-mil race. Yoo ho!
Filed under: Running
I am plagued by self-doubt about my ability to do the 10 this Saturday (if you give me all the time in the world, of course I can do it…but this race closes in 2 hours and Chicago is known to attract fast runners…so I could only finish this race if I can average 15min per mile….yesterday I THINK I did 8 miles and it is the first time I run outdoor, and I think the pace is rather dismal, and now my leg is hurting in strange places). Anyway, here is something to keep me motivated.
Filed under: Musings
And now, a sense of relief sets in. I can finally settle back to my normal life, but not without a little struggle. Things could occur rapidly on a mercurial spring night. It began slowly, then gathered up pace, and then it morphed into several unexpected directions. That’s the complicated interplay of reality and expectations, and I take that knowledge and live with it.
I came back from the skit show of our department, something which a group of dedicated and creative classmates and I had been working our butt off for in the past couple months after several late night sessions in my apartment. The result was 4 skits, 3 songs with changed lyrics, and a rambuctious MC.
Just let me say it right off the bet that I have never worked with a more dedicated group of people. I mean, these people are working not for any reward, yet they are all creative, and never ask for anything more. And most of all, you don’t need to push them to work — they automatically exert their best — and their best is really best that I have ever seen of any people. I mean, this is the first time I find myself in a group where I am not the most dedicated person there. This group I worked with, I have to say, is the most talented group — ever. I mean, really seriously.
That said, I go on with life now with full appreciation for this experience.
As for my conclusion about my debut solo-singing performance in front of 180+ audience, all I could say is — It felt pretty horrible. My first note was off, I was sure. And then it got better, only to get worse when I forgot to enter through the instrumental break and in that moment of panic also forgot the words. In the end, it went by in a flesh. I almost have no memory of what had passed. However, I got feedbacks from the audience that at least I could sing.
That quiet moment, when I saw Mark leaned on the stair, and summarized that what we need in this econ department is more loving, I had this pang of heartfelt happiness. However breezy that moment was, it was a moment. The expectation of where the night might lead to is totally unrealized, yet the end of the day also felt right (helped taking a crazily-drunk Brazilian home after dancing on the empty street), and ….sanely, steadfastly concrete. It fully equipped me to do what I need to do.
When I was playing Scott Joplin’s Entertainer, it suddenly reminded me of all my previous childhood dreams, which I had already achieved and therefore devalued their importance in my life agenda.
So when I was in middle school, I had this ambition to play the Entertainer. I think I heard it the first time in a piano bar, and it always got me jumping and made me all high for a long time. I remember that the performer of this song always played it in such a carefree way, that I thought to myself: this is the person I aspire to be!
So in middle school, I got my hands on the score. With all the chords, I thought, wow this is hard. I toiled at it and then I could play it ever since. If you ask me to perform one song which I have committed to my memory, it is the Entertainer. While I have forgotten pretty much all the classical pieces I had to play for piano exams, or all the pop pieces I played as a hobby, I still have Entertainer. It is always there.
And today when I played it again, the memory of the feeling of that childhood ambition came back. It was the sensation when I stared at the chords in 8th grade, and thought, I have to play this because this is the kind of pianist I want to be!
And after I could do it, it doesn’t seem to important, and I wasn’t as good as a pianist as I want or envision myself to be.
Playing the Entertainer was that one childhood dream which filled me with motion when I was a child.
Filed under: Musings
Randy Pausch in his last lectures talked about how to achieve his childhood dreams. These childhood dreams define who you are. So the question is, what are my childhood dreams?
At some point in one’s adult life, one’s childhood dreams get lost amidst the overwhelming realities of everyday life. Dreams are almost by definition something that have a long time frame; dreams cannot be achieved overnight; dreams require vision, and planning; dreams require perseverance and patience. Most of all, dreams require faith.
Lacking any of those preconditions, dreams are lost.
When I was younger (meaning, < 21 years of age), I have dreams. But now I am forgetting them, one by one, and not replacing them at all by new ones. If the trend goes on, by the time I am 30, these childhood dreams would permanently leave my memory forever, and I would not have any dreams.
So, inspired by Professor Randy Pausch, let me try to remember what my dreams are, so that I will remember them in times that try to make me forget them:
1. To gallop on a black horse in the green grassland of Mongolia. (check)
2. finish the novel about Sea Ranch.
3. Sail regularly and do distance and race.
4. Sing the American Songbook with a jazz band (perhaps do some open mic in a bar?)
5. run a marathon
6. get something published in a respectable journal
7. have some influence in policy formation
8. Own a big house (yesterday night I had yet ANOTHER dream about this huge house. Again, I found myself exploring this house, discovering little nooks and corners which totally delighted me. Why oh why do I always dream about exploring big houses that either my parents or I bought?)
Being able to do any one of these items would make me VERY VERY VERY happy.
I understand that you got to do things for the right reasons; that if you got the right reasons, you can almost certainly achieve it. In that matter, I wonder if #6 and 7 are correctly motivated.
I think I am slowly finding my pace. Here is my record so far:
4/13/2009: averaged 14 min/mile (did 3 miles)
4/23/2009: averaged 11.52 min/mile (in the first 4 miles), averaged 13 min/mile in total 5 miles (walk the 5th mile). I
5/4/2009: averaged 11.42 min/mile (in the first 4 miles), averaged 12 min/miles (in the first 5 miles). In total, did 6 miles (averaging 13.2 min/mile when run the first 5 miles and walk the 6th mile).
My understanding so far in running long distance:
*** very important to clear mind of everything. Although there is a TV screen in front of me, I don’t watch it. It is of foremost importance to not see anything and just focus.
1st mile, very slow — pace 13 or 14 min/ mile
2nd, 3rd, 4th mile, gaining pace, full power — pace is 10 min/ mile
(In my mind, while doing 2-4th mile, was screaming “CRANK IT CRANK IT!!!!!!” I believe this is what they call runner’s high)
5th mile — pace is 13 mil / hour….feel like the back of my knee is bleeding. Strange pain in strange places.
Between 5th – 6th mile — Hey, I feel like I can do more!
It is during 5th – 6th mile when I felt that, yes, I can do 10, because the “CRANK IT CRANK IT” voice was reemerging during those miles.
